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Devlin Thompson On The State Of Modern Newspaper And The Crappiness Of Old Ones
posted April 16, 2009

I'll agree that the cited headline is near-gibberish, and I'm inclined to think the world's been going to hell in a hand-basket since some vague, unspecified point before my birth (41 years ago as of the 24th); nevertheless, I think you're overlooking the remarkable crappiness of a lot of small-time papers of that era. I always like to check out old copies of the Anderson (SC) Daily Mail, partly because it carried "Criswell Predicts," plus an interesting assortment of strips, but mainly because its staff had a real talent for mangling headlines. In the process of boiling them down, their tendency would be to remove a little too much. My favorite being an article about an incident where fish were being collected and transported around a newly-constructed dam to their spawning grounds, headlined as "FISH BE SUCKED UP IN SCHOOLS". "MORE CHAOS, TERROR CAN BE EXPECTED" is another that always tickled me, though it's more vague than ridiculous. On the plus side, they did usually have the spelling thing worked out, unlike the modern world of all typos, all the time.