January 24, 2010
FFF Results Post #194 -- Confessional
On Friday, CR
readers were asked to, "Make Five Confessions Related To Comics That Don't Necessarily Portray You In A Flattering Light." This is how they responded.
1. I remember my credit card and debit card security numbers according to what comic book issue each represents (I had a card with "137" for years
2. I prefer my comic books bagged and boarded.
3. I frequently think of throwing all my comics away.
4. I have gone several years at a time between CBLDF memberships.
5. I know exactly what the last post on this blog will be.
1. People who read only superhero comics or only read alt/indy books are foolish.
2. Blackest night and rainbow lantern corps feel like warmed over fan fiction.
3. I don't get the cult of warren ellis.
4. I completely understand why some people call Lost Girls
5. Going to a comic-con and seeing all the fat social rejects cripples my self esteem for days if not weeks.
1. I enjoy The Micronauts
more than I enjoy Love and Rockets
2. I was confused by Watchmen
#1 the first time I read it.
3. I can't be bothered to pre-order anything, much less titles that could benefit from it.
4. I would rather read a good story than great art.
5. Sometimes I let the crap side of this medium and business get the better of me.
1. I couldn't make myself finish reading Blankets
2. I could make myself finish reading Ultimo
3. I'm still mad about the Scarlet Witch.
4. I don't think I own any comics created by Daniel Clowes.
5. My "to read" pile is completely out of hand.
5. I don't care about Schulz
4. Was never a "Caniffer"
3. Never read Feiffer
2. I hoard really bad comics that are only meaningful to me and basically have no value whatsoever.
1. I cut the tops off of the plastic bags for my comics so I don't have to mess around with tape.
Scott O. Brown
1) I can name the location (store, convention, trade, etc.) where every comic I have ever owned was purchased from.
2) At one point in my life, I had memorized all the dialogue to Comico's Sam and Max: Freelance Police.
3) I once violently threw a cat down a flight of stairs for taking a dump on a copy of Justice League America
4) My LCS is a flea market stand.
5) I used my knowledge of X-men
comics to lose my virginity to a Marvel girl, but because I was a DC boy, I knew it wouldn't last.
1. I own complete runs of both Team America
2. My first experiences with Kirby's art were in his Captain America
run, and for the life of me I couldn't understand why anybody worshipped the man.
3. My best friend and I went to see Superman IV
on the day it opened, and we went over an hour early, expecting a huge line. Oops.
4. I stopped bagging and boarding my comics almost a decade ago.
5. I no longer purchase a single pamphlet comic from Marvel or DC, which probably sounds weird coming from someone that runs a comics website.
1. As a teen, I had my comics catalogued on index cards -- and cross-referenced.
2. Because I write comics and am a newspaper reporter, an uncle occasionally refers to me as Clark Kent or Jimmy Olsen.
3. I can't wrap my mind around reading manga "backwards." I really have trouble with it.
4. I know more about Batman than most people probably should.
5. Somewhere, there are family photos of preschool-aged me running around the house in a red cape and a blue shirt with a red S on it.
1) I think the non-superhero comics I read are always better than the superhero ones, but for the most part I end up rereading the superhero ones more.
2) I download comics but I honestly try to keep it to things that unavailable in collections (and, no, being in a B&W collection doesn't count).
3) I've thrown comics away. Good ones, even.
4) The vast majority of non-Crumb, non-Shelton undergrounds bore me to tears.
5) Here's the biggie: I do not see the appeal of Carl Barks.
1) I have an entire room that's overrun by comics and graphic -- in boxes, stacked loose, everywhere. I don't have enough room to organize them.
2) I've come to view comp copies of comics and GNs for review as something of a curse (see #1)
3) I have a full set of Blackest Night promotional rings sitting on my computer desk.
4) There have been occasions on which I've bought multiple copies of the same comic book.
5) I used to own (and play) the original DC Role-Playing Game by Mayfair Games and a slew of game modules.
1. During a Legion of Super-Heroes panel at one of the late '90s Chicago conventions, I started to argue with Mark Waid about who was smarter, Reed Richards or Brainiac 5.
2. For most of my childhood, Jack Kirby artwork creeped me out.
3. I am woefully uneducated about manga.
4. Christopher Reeve's performances convinced me that the Clark Kent disguise could totally work.
5. Before this weekend is out, I will have re-read "The Fiend With Five Faces!" from JLA #156 (July 1978), and probably a few other Gerry Conway/Dick Dillin JLA issues. In fact, I'll do that right now....
1. I own most, if not all, of Image Comics' debut issues from the early '90s, along with a decent amount of their output from their first year or two of existence.
2. Despite finding myself perpetually defending the medium as being "more than just super heroes," I still purchase more super hero comics than indy/alt comics (though that's slowly shifting).
3. I have gone several years at a time between Comics Journal subscriptions.
4. When I was a starving young man in my early 20's, I canceled my sizable pull list at a small, struggling, yet incredibly friendly and customer-oriented, comic shop because I was broke, yet I told them it was because I was moving. They virtually begged me to stay, even offering to deliver the comics to me. I stuck by my story, embarrassed by my lack of funds. They closed within the year, though I can't say either way how the loss of my business affected them.
5. When I was a younger man, I dated women for months without mentioning once my love of comics nor my large collection. Again, due to embarrassment.
1) I went through a period as a kid where I ironed the covers of my comics in order to remove any possible wrinkles and to keep them flat.
2) Back in junior high I tried to steal a piece of candy when I went to pick out some comics at the newsstand. The owner caught me and gave me hell... in a nice way.
3) I see more interesting comics than ever before. At the same time I see more over-hyped crap than ever before. It's a puzzling conundrum for me.
4) I can easily rationalize spending the money necessary for one of the many classic comic strip or comic book reprint volumes, but I have a difficult time justifying the three to six dollars needed to purchase the majority of mainstream comic books.
5) Thanks to my oafish finesse I have, at one time or the other in the past, dropped a large pile of comic books on my foot. It hurts like hell!
1. I secretly wish every girl in real life looked as though they were drawn by Darwyn Cooke
2. I wish the original Earth 2 would come back as it was in 1986 and it continued to be ruled-over by Roy Thomas
3. I think that Persepolis
(as a comic) is a very poor quality rip-off of David B.
4. Whenever I read an article by Gary Groth, I have to look up at least a dozen words in the dictionary
5. There are moments when the details of every day life get complicated and I wish I had Spurgeon or Fiore around to explain things to me clearly.
1. When I needed the cash, I sold for an absurdly low amount the collection of about half the Ditko-era Dr. Strange/Strange Tales that I had purchased at once for $2-4 each at a convention some years before. My longing for those books now exponentially outweighs whatever long-forgotten relief that cash bought me at the time.
2. In another really bad deal, I ignorantly traded dozens of Post baseball cards -- the valuable ones from the 60s--for a 2/3 complete set of Tomb of Dracula
3. In a speculative frenzy, I purchased 20 copies of each of the first seven issues of New Mutants
4. I have not kept a single one of the 5000 comics I accumulated from 5-15 years old except for the Charlton Yogi Bear comic that was my first one.
5. I am completely incapable of destroying a comic book, no matter how awful the book or how much I don't want it. I can't trash it, I can't even recycle it. I can only give it away and leave it for someone else to destroy.
1. These days I buy WAAAY more entertaining/mainstream than fine art/indie comics.
2. I sometimes lie to my girlfriend, friends, and family about how much I spend on comics.
3. I go to the comics shop almost everyday and purchase something almost every time I'm there.
4. I've tried (and mostly failed) to use my comics-industry personality to impress women when dating.
5. REPRESENTATIONAL ART: I prefer Steve Rude to Jaime Hernandez.
1. The older brother of a good friend of mine committed a fairly violent suicide when we were in high school. About a week after the funeral, my friend gave me his entire collection of comics saying that he didn't want them any more. It didn't occur to me until years later that I should have seen that as a potential warning sign that he might commit suicide himself. Fortunately, he didn't, but I still find it a great failing on my part for not having thought it at the time.
2. Shortly after we began dating, I took my girlfriend to Wizard World Chicago. She was more curious to see me "in my element" than having any interest in comics themselves. She was pretty well done by 2:00 and began dropping not-so-subtle clues that she was ready to leave. I remained totally oblivious for at least another hour before she finally said, "I'm tired and my feet hurt. I'm done. We need to leave. Now."
3. Back when I was moderating an online comic message board, a flame war once erupted when one person posted suggestive (but not explicit) original drawings of a comic character that another poster took offense to. Once the flame war died down, the artist in question emailed me another sketch he had done of the comic character beating the offended poster to a pulp. Though I officially sanctioned the artist for violating the rules of the message board, I really liked that last drawing.
4. I once had the opportunity to buy a complete run of Tim Truman's Scout
fairly cheaply. I ultimately declined, though, because I figured that sooner or later I'd inherit my dad's copies anyway.
5. Several years ago, I purchased $12.47 worth of comics at an out-of-town comic shop. I gave the clerk a ten and a five. He handed me a twenty, three quarters and a penny as change. I didn't correct him and simply walked out of the store. (I might note, interestingly, that there is no combination of two bills I could've given him that could possibly have led to that change, regardless of what denominations he thought the bill and coins he handed me might have been.)
1) I've never owned or read the collected (graphic novel) versions of Watchmen
or Jimmy Corrigan
2) I once had my wife stand in line to get a sketch from Paul Pope. Of course, once she saw Pope, I’m sure she was much happier to stand in line to see him than to sit at my table with me.
3) I never bought a Pez dispenser until I read The Maxx
4) I wore the blank badge. Actually, I’m not at all ashamed of that.
5) I saw Howard the Duck
in the theater. And I liked it.
1. I often think about burning all my comics in a monstrous funeral pyre and dedicating my life to something more worthwhile.
2. My possession complex is so great when it comes to comics that, even though I tried and failed twice to sell Codename: Knockout
#2 on eBay for one dollar, I can't just throw it away.
3. Even though I think the whole speculator-driven, comics-as-financial-investment thing is a shameful obscenity, I still wish my collection was worth more than it is.
4. I own hundreds of comics (maybe more) that I've never bothered to open and read.
5. In the '80s, I used to buy comics exclusively at one newsagent (with trembling hands) because the woman behind the counter had fabulous boobs.
Justin J. Major
1. I preferred the DC Adventure line for children to the adult DC Comics line of titles.
2. I hate John Byrne for killing Jean Grey, James McDonald Hudson and the Richards baby.
3. I carry a copy of Ivan Brunetti's "Hee" with me at all times.
4. I don't "get" Krazy Kat. Or Bean World. Or Bone. Meh.
5. I've owned the Love & Rockets "Palomar" collection for years, but I have never read it.
1. I think Thor is stronger than the Hulk but I root for the Hulk because I hate Thor.
2. My favorite comic book has nothing to do with super-heroes (it's classic Bat Lash).
3. I was a co-conspirator to a prank phone call to Ernie Bushmiller.
4. I love Terry And The Pirates. Steve Canyon? Not so much.
5. Even though I did it for a while and thoroughly enjoyed it, I have a hard time explaining to non-comics people how a comic book is put together.
James C. Langdell
1. Most of my comics are in a storage space in boxes I haven't peeked into for over 20 years.
2. At a rather tender age, rarely seen examples of Rupert The Bear stories looked scary weird to me.
3. It offended my 10-year-old sense of fairness that Lois Lane and Jimmy Olsen had their own comic books, but their boss Perry White didn't.
4. In past years, I've made the mistake of buying the same issue three times while waiting to read the whole arc at once eventually. These days I don't even bother trying.
5. I'm afraid I still really don't get Krazy Kat.
1. In first grade I swiped another kid's Superman LP out of her backpack. A year or two later I threw it out in a mix of remorse and fear of getting caught.
2. In middle school I "borrowed" my brother's copy of Howard the Duck magazine (the one with the topless Beverly) and took it to school. Someone swiped it, and I never 'fessed up to my brother.
3. After a particularly inspiring church camp, I threw a comic with more topless women into the trash and commanded the comic, in the name of Jesus, to burn. But Jesus wasn't dispensing cheap miracles for confused boys that day.
4. All my letters to The Comics Journal
and half my posts on Comicon.com and TCJ.com message boards are well worth being ashamed of.
5. Speaking of which, during my six years of desk jobbing I spent half my work time on comics websites.
1. My wife caught me laughing hysterically while reading Little Lulu
2. I consider Grant Morrison a genius
3. I own a Sandman
4. I've never read a single issue of Spider-Man
5. I think Kramers Ergot
7 is stoopid
1. I have dreams in comics form
2. I can tell who wrote a Comics Comics post from just the first ten words with 94% accuracy
3. Your knowing the last post for this blog instantly reminded me of Syzygy Darklock knowing the future place of his death in Jim Starlin's Dreadstar
4. I once spent a night in figuring out Agata Morio's Red-Colored Elegy song
5. And I'm spending tonight in answering this question
posted 12:00 pm PST
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