Not Comics: FFF Special—X-Mas Fives
Since I originally hadn't planned on having Five For Friday today and I don't feel like renumbering the next 50 of them, you'll have to make do with a FFF special. Thanks to those that participated. I look forward to getting back to your more comics-related response lists in 2011. -- Tom Spurgeon
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Five Underrated Holiday Movie Marathons By Tom Spurgeon
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1. State Of Play
By which I mean the original BBC series, not the horribly truncated and made-much-dumber Hollywood film release. A long, fervent and super-loopy love letter to the self- and actual drama experienced by journalists, with personable-as-hell actors in all the big roles. Turn your brain off and enjoy.
*****
2. The Kingdom I-II
This is the Lars Von Trier TV show, the basis for one of the worst North American adaptations of anything ever. Don't let Stephen King stop you from enjoying the original, though. I've never met Santa Claus, but I wouldn't be surprised if he looked and acted like Stig Helmer. Ragged, super-funny and if you turn yourself over to it, a touch disturbing. Mostly just funny, though. Rewards repeated viewing.
*****
3. Red Cliff I-II
No matter what the above trailer suggests, definitely watch the four-hour, two-part version over the smooshed-together US film release. John Woo's return to major film-making isn't without its oddities -- some of the acting never quite comes to life -- but they don't make films like this any more and this one will make you wish they could.
*****
4. Slings And Arrows
It should be the most annoying television show of all time, but more often than not this Canadian comedy about three seasons at a Shakespeare-focused repertory company manages to be genuinely funny and sweet, true enough to its character types and setting that anyone who's ever come close to putting on a show will find something to which or to whom they can relate. I'd call it a thinking man's Glee, but I've never seen Glee outside of the omnipresent commercials. Anyway, my mom liked this, and a few of my cynical, twenty-something friends that saw it also liked it. Tricky and excellent lead performance by the frequently mis-utilized Paul Gross and an all-time shameless, chewing the scenery, recurring guest-star turn by Don McKellar. Seriously, Val Kilmer in Tombstone rolls his eyes at McKellar here. Like all the best comedies, this one lets the women be funny in equal measure to the men.
*****
5. The Life And Adventures Of Nicholas Nickleby
Back in the very early 1980s when it first appeared, John Simon dismissed this eight-hour stage version of the Dickens novel as middlebrow entertainment. I like it for exactly that reason -- it's a very pleasurable, energetic and not in any way intellectually rigorous romp through a big-ass story -- a comedy, don't you know -- unpacked in a way you can see the effort of it being told. Everyone looks like they're having fun, even the guy playing Smike. This televised version is the reason your theater-loving friend cringes slightly instead of smiling when Roger Rees shows up in a guest spot on an American science fiction show.
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Five Best Lines From It's A Wonderful Life By Danny Ceballos
1. "Youth is wasted on the wrong people."
2. "Here's your hat, what's your hurry?"
3. "What are you but a warped, frustrated young man?"
4. "Merry Christmas, you wonderful old Building and Loan!"
5. "Say brainless, don't you know where coconuts come from?"
*****
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Five Holiday Comics Smackdowns By Matt Silvie
* Spurge vs Santa
* Lockjaw vs Rudolph
* Doofus vs Mrs. Santa's dirty underwear aka "stinkiesâ„¢"
* Henry Hotchkiss vs Jack Skellington
* Man-Thing vs baby Jesus
Five Christmas Movies That Make Me Cry By Michael May
1. The Small One
2. Miracle on 34th Street
3. White Christmas
4. Home Alone
5. Love Actually
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Five Favorite Songs Played At Christmas-time That Don't Actually Mention Any Holidays By Michael Grabowski
1. "Linus And Lucy," Vince Guaraldi Trio
Though it shows up in some form in pretty much every Peanuts animated show, its premiere in and its presence on the soundtrack record and CD forever link it to the holiday. Every kid who has taken piano lessons since the late 60s has wanted to or tried to play this song, I bet. I know I did.
2. "Winter Wonderland," Ray Charles and/or Harry Connick, Jr. When Harry Met Sally features Charles' typically bluesy/slightly schlocky approach in the scene where the just-friends buy a Christmas tree. The soundtrack CD instead features Connick playing it solo New Orleans-style with no vocals. Connick wins by a mile, but Charles' gets a nod for injecting the whole "dream by the fire" scenario with a little heat.
3. "Sleigh Ride," Johnny Mathis
I love the fun romance in this tune. Like "Winter Wonderland" it completely ignores the miserable conditions of actual snow outside in any kind of urban or suburban area and you can tell the lyrics were probably written by people who live in Southern California where snow is a soft white powder created for a movie set. Do people in Fargo like singing along?
4. "Baby, It's Cold Outside," Dean Martin (original version)
OK, even in its own time this song is kind of smarmy, and in the current climate it's downright creepy but I like this other side of the "Let it Snow" theme. Call it a guilty pleasure, for real. Either way it's freezing cold out there in that winter wonderland and that sleigh ride home won't be much fun so who wouldn't want to stay inside and flirt some more?
5. "Sweet Little Baby Boy," James Brown
Doesn't get any airplay on the holiday stations and it's the syrupy side of James Brown that most people aren't familiar with, but he delivers it with passion, and it's all about the reason for the season, so I like it.
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Five Favorite Films That Also Happen To Be About Women That You Should Watch While Trapped At Your Family's Home For The Holidays By Tom Devlin
1. Gypsy (this ran on a local uhf station in the 70s constantly and as an early teen I watched it again and again. I was obsessed with its super clean stripper story.)
2. The Effect of Gamma Rays on Man-in-the-Moon Marigolds... (I must have seen this as a movie of the week. I loved the overly long title and I really loved Joanne Woodward's wrecked mom. I think the girls in this movie reminded me of the older girls in my neighborhood.)
3. Woman Under the Influence (Of course. Gena Rowlands. So good in every Cassavetes film. This is the saddest performance ever committed to film.)
4. Prime of Miss Jean Brodie (Maggie Smith is amazing in this. Pamela Franklin is nerd gorgeous. Women making bad decisions.)
5. Career Girls (not anyone's favorite Mike Leigh but this one sticks with me in ways that others like Secrets and Lies or Vera Drake don't. I love Katrin Cartlidge's neediness in both this and Naked. I obviously need to do a KC film festival. I love every single Mike Leigh woman.)
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Five Movies That Take Place During The Holidays But Are Not Considered Holiday Movies By Andrew Mansell
1. Lion in Winter
2. The Thin Man
3. Diner
4. Gremlins
5. Eyes Wide Shut
1. 1971 AFC playoff game -- Miami vs Kansas City - the standard bearer for all holiday-related sporting events
2. 1977 AFC playoff game -- Oakland vs Baltimore Colts -- ghost to the post
3. Any Blue Gray Football Classic -- remember when this was only game to watch Xmas afternoon as you either unwrapped presents or waited for Xmas dinner?
4. NBA Christmas games -- They have apparently been playing NBA games on Xmas since the league started but it wasn't until the mid 1980s it became a big deal. Insert your favorite Bird/Magic/Jordan game here.
5. 1982 NWA World Title Match -- Ric Flair vs Kerry Von Erich -- one of the most famous wrestling angles of the modern era unfolds as Michael Hayes slams the steel cage door on Von Erich, igniting the famous Von Erichs vs. Fabulous Freebirds feud.
1. Adeste Fideles (traditional hymn)
2. Mary, Did You Know? (contemporary religious)
3. Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer (pop song)
4. Christmas Wrapping (best rock/rap/soul/hip-hop)
5. All I Got For Christmas Was Drunk (sad/funny)
